


I Love The Light in Your Eyes and The Dark in Your Heart

by tinylwt91



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fanfiction, Gay, Larry Stylinson Is Real, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-24 10:19:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14353461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinylwt91/pseuds/tinylwt91
Summary: Where Louis hates the world, and especially a young man named Harry Styles.Title from the song 'Valentine' by 5 Seconds of Summer.TRIGGER WARNING:Louis is depressed and suicidal, DO NOT READ if things like that trigger you!





	I Love The Light in Your Eyes and The Dark in Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> So, here’s “I Love the Light in Your Eyes and the Dark in Your Heart”. I must reiterate- Louis is depressed and suicidal. PLEASE do not read if you are triggered by things relating to that!
> 
> Please do not post this anywhere else without my permission. My twitter is @tinylwt91 if you have any questions.   
> Enjoy :)

The cool air pushed Louis’s hair off of his forehead, the tears on his cheeks making his face only colder. His knuckles were turning white as he gripped the concrete wall in front of him, listening to the cars as they passed by on the busy highway below. His chest heaved with every shaky breath, but he couldn’t help but feel more and more numb as time went on.  _You need to do this, Louis. Everything will be better this way._ He squeezes his eyes shut once more when the thoughts come to his mind.  _Do it, do it!_ _You’ll be dead before you hit the ground, just do it!_  

His head is pounding as he slides his hands onto the concrete once more, this time hoisting himself up and sitting on the wall. The roughness of the surface caused him to scratch up his hands a bit, but he doesn’t mind. He’d be gone soon enough anyway. He closes his eyes, his body shaking with sobs as he listened to the cars below him. He hears a car stop, followed by footsteps behind him, and he opens his teary eyes, panicking as he frantically tries to push himself off the edge. Just as he’s about to fall, two strong arms wrap around his stomach. 

“NO!” Louis wails, reaching towards the ledge as he’s pulled back onto the safety of the bridge. He tries to pull from the man’s arms, however he’s only pulled to his chest in a tight hug. “L-Let me go! I-I want to die! Stop!” He yells, still squirming in his arms in hopes to break free and be able to jump once and for all. 

“Relax, relax, breath lad, please breath. Liam, call 911!” The man’s voice is soft in his ear, yet Louis still struggles to get away. After a few minutes he finally gives up, just laying and sobbing in the man’s arms.

“I hate you.” He spats over and over as he continues to choke on his sobs. “I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! Why couldn’t you just let me die? I hate you!” He’s a mess, face drenched in tears and snot, hitting the male’s arms as he cries out in frustration. After what feels like hours of laying on the hard ground with the male practically holding him down, police cars and ambulances start to show up, causing Louis to cry even harder. He could barely see the man through his tears, wishing he never had to see his stupid green eyes or chocolate brown hair again. He glares at the male’s friend as well, apparently Liam, as well. Fuck them. Fuck them both for taking away what he wanted so badly- to disappear. 

He was strapped onto the gurney and was still shaking with sobs as he was loaded onto the ambulance. The took the string out of his hoodie, as well as his shoelaces. They’re taking away more ways Louis could hurt himself. 

“Fuck you!” Louis screams towards the male who’s standing by the doors in concern. “I hate you! Fuck you!” The doors closed and he leaned his head back, sobbing as he stared at the ceiling of the moving vehicle. Oh, how he wishes he would’ve just died. 

\---------------------------

Louis forced himself to open his eyes, even though the room was too brightly lit and hurt them. As soon as he opened them, he wished he didn't. His mum was sitting on the chair next to him, holding his hand as tears flushed her face. Louis sighed. He hadn't thought of what to do if he had survived- he wasn't expecting anyone to save him. He sighed as he slowly sat up, pulling his hand away from his mum and wrapping his arms around his knees.

"Mum, I'm fine, don't worry about it." He mumbled to her, before she had the chance to speak. She shakes her head, moving closer to his bed and stroking his hair as she continued to silently cry.

"I'm so glad you're okay. I don't know what I would've done if-" She couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence, choking on her own sobs. Louis sighed, resting his head on his knees. This is not how he wanted it to go. He felt disappointed with himself. He didn't want to see his mum this upset, especially after everything she's going through.

"Well, I'm fine. I just want to get out of here." He murmured, quite emotionless, but meaning it. He hated hospitals with a passion, the stupid white walls and floors and the purposely frigid air. Home isn't much better, but he'd rather be anywhere but there at the moment. "When can I leave?" His mum sighed in her seat, playing with the ends of her hair.

"The police were called, Louis.. Do you realize how serious this is? I know you've been having problems.. You need to talk to someone, if you're not going to talk to me, okay? If talked to a couple therapists, maybe you can start off with a group session to feel more comfortable..." Her voice was soft and full of worry, but Louis couldn't help but glare at her.

"I don't  _need_ to talk to anyone, Mum. I'm fine." He rolled his eyes at her before laying back in his bed.

"You tried to kill yourself, Louis! We have to do something! I can't just let you sit here wanting to die. We need you here, Louis. If you don't want to talk to the therapist, fine. But you're still going. This is not a discussion."

"This is exactly why I tried in the first place! You don't fucking listen to a world I say, you only care about yourselves!" He yelled at her, and as her face fell, he felt kind of guilty. It was as if Louis took her heart from her body and stomped it flat. He sighed softly and rolled over. "Wake me when I can leave."

"Louis-" She starts, however, there's a knock at the door that causes her to stop. She gave a gentle smile to the figure at the door, before standing up. "Hi, Harry. Do you want me to give you two some privacy?" Louis glanced towards the doors, furrowing his eyebrows.  _Who the fuck is Harry? Why is she leaving me alone with him?_   He keeps his back turned, however, not willing to talk to anyone else today. He heard his mum exit the room, and Harry sits in the chair next to him.

"Um, hi." His voice was deep and he spoke slow, the words just flowing right off of his tongue. "I know you don't know me, you probably don't remember me, but.. I'm Harry. I'm the one that saved you." Louis began to feel the anger boil up inside of him, like a volcano ready to burst. He sat up and spun to face Harry, sending a harsh glare in his direction.

"You think you  _saved_ me, huh? Look at you, Mr. Superhero! You saved someone who didn't want to fucking be saved! You've already made my life twenty times worse, so fucking congrats, man! Bet you can't wait to see you name on the front page of every fucking newspaper in town: 'young hero saves pathetic boy from suicide'. Sounds like a great fucking title, innit?" He was breathing heavy and he instantly felt hot, almost sure that if anyone touched him they would get burned. He threw a pillow at the boy, who was staring at him with wide eyes and an opened mouth. "Get the fuck out of my room, now."

"I just.. I don't think you really wanted to die, Louis.. I think that maybe your life is hard right now-"

"You don't fucking know me! Don't tell me what I wanted and what I didn't, just fuck off!" Although it had only been a few minutes, Louis had had enough. He pressed the nurse button on his bed, hoping he could think of a lie to have her kick Harry out.

"I can't say I'm sorry for saving you. One day you're going to appreciate what I-" Louis cuts him off with a load groan. When will this boy understand that he doesn't want to talk to him. He wants him to leave and to never have to see him again. Luckily, the nurse comes in with a soft smile.

"You okay, Louis?" Her voice is soft and quiet. Jackie has always been his favorite nurse. Every time he's at the hospital- it's not often, but still- he requests for her to be his nurse. She always listened to him, yet didn't push him to do anything he didn't want to- one of the reasons he liked her so much. He pulled off a fake yawn, laying back in his bed.

"I'm  _so_ tired, Nurse Jackie. Can you tell Mum to come back to the morning? And I'm not accepting any more visitors, especially not this one. Thanks love." He sent a glare in Harry's direction before a sweet smile towards Jackie.

"Of course, Louis. Get your rest. Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave the room." Jackie was kind to Harry, yet firm. Harry rolled his eyes as he stood up, before looking at Louis. 

"One day, you'll appreciate it. Promise." He nodded towards Louis with a light smile before exiting the room, Jackie following behind. Louis sighed as he flopped back in his bed and closed his eyes. They took away his phone, so he couldn't even text Niall and tell him everything is alright. He hated when everyone worried about him when there was so much more in the world that deserved to be worried about. No one should have to worry about Louis. He sighs once more.  _I guess I was being selfish, and now everyone is worried about me._ Louis thought to himself as he curled into a tight ball. He started to think about the people who could possibly be worried about him. Mum, his sisters, Niall. He had some more friends, too. And, maybe even Liam and Harry would worry about him. He chews on his lip, and as he slowly starts to drift to sleep, he thinks;  _I wish I died so I wouldn't have to go through the Hell tomorrow will bring._


End file.
